Blindfolded Super Mario 64 speedrunner sets new world record in disastrous attempt that left him dying seven times and declaring "this run sucks"

Bubzia, the blindfolded speedrunning specialist, is taking on a new category in Super Mario 64. Earlier this week, he embarked on a run that immediately turned into a disaster, full of deaths, missed tricks and bad jumps. It turned out to be a new world record.

In early October, Bubzia completed a 118-day quest for a new world record in the blindfolded 16-star category with a A world record of less than 20 minutes that the community once thought was ‘completely impossible’. His new goal is a new world record in the blindfolded 70-star category, and to practice for that he is making his first gravel attempts in the 31-star category. Almost all of the 31-star tricks feed into the 70-star tricks, so attempting world records in the shorter category is a perfect way to practice the new tricks and routing that are essential to the bigger goal.

This week, a 31-star effort got off to an immediate bad start with a missed clip in the first level, forcing Bubzia to use a backup Strat. “Usually I would reset here if we were going for a world record,” he said. “I don’t want to waste time on resets when we can practice so many stars on the run.” About eight minutes into the run, he lost track of his position in the race under the blindfold. He managed to find a door to get his bearings, but noted that “under normal circumstances that’s a reset of the run”.

When he flew off the edge of a cliff with a baby penguin in the Cool, Cool Mountain course, Bubzia could only shake his head and say, “I give up. Honestly, fuck this star so much. It’s ridiculous on this point.” A few minutes later he died again when he forgot to set the correct camera angle. Then he died again – and again. Ultimately, he was given a full game to spare, forcing him to run all the way back from the starting area. He ultimately died four times on a single star in Lethal Lava Land before finally claiming the prize. “That was actually a first attempt, if you think about it,” he joked.

Blindfolded SM64 – 31 stars in 39:12 world record by Bubzia – YouTube
Blindfolded SM64 - 31 stars in 39:12 world record by Bubzia - YouTube

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After forgetting to set the correct camera mode again at 27 minutes, Bubzia declared, “ugh, this run sucks, dude.” A few minutes later he walked quite a bit through a section of the Hazy Maze cave, remarking “that was really clean – really a very clean star.” But he lost his position again just before taking the star himself. “I lied. I liedguy. Okay? I lied, dude. Where’s the star?” He still managed to get the star after a few seconds of trial and error, but it served as “proof that I’m there blindfolded.”

As the attempt reached its final stages, Bubzia said, “I can’t wait until we get some really good runs again,” and that pretty much set the tone for the last few minutes of the video. But at this point it started to become clear to the Twitch chat – who were clearly not blindfolded as they watched the timing differences from Bubzia’s previous efforts – that this run was somehow hitting world record pace. The new tricks and routing were just enough to overcome all the failures along the way.

“Imagine having to upload this mess as a WR,” one commentator joked as the end of the game neared. But that’s exactly what happened. Bubzia took the last star, lifted his blindfold and stared in disbelief at his last time. “Is that a world record? Oh my god, this is a joke. World record by five seconds. Oh my god. What the fuck? Dude, this run sucks. I’m not saying this to make the speedrun meme. This run This is really that stupid,” he said, laughing all the while “But hey, GGs, I guess! Yay!”

So yes, Bubzia’s 39:12 completion of the blindfolded 31-star category currently ranks as a world record – although given all the obvious room for improvement and Bubzia’s continued efforts in the category, this probably won’t stand for much longer. His goal is to get the time to about 35 minutes before moving on to the next category.

Bubzia’s current, thoroughly cursed record is in good company until it is replaced, at least. Super Mario 64 speedruns are full of triumphant misfortune, such as the “most cringeworthy world record of all time” set in 2023or the single-level record set earlier this year, seconds after the runner called his effort “sloppy.” You gotta take your W’s where you can get ’em, folks.

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