Dear Abby: My kids have given me an ultimatum if I get back with a cheating ex

DEAR ABBY: I was in a five-year relationship with a man. We broke up because he was unfaithful. Even though I am willing to forgive and still have feelings for him, my children do not love this man and do not want me to reconnect with him. My kids say if I do that, they won’t want to have a relationship with me anymore.

Their ultimatum doesn’t seem fair. I’m afraid I won’t fall in love again, and I don’t want to be alone later in life. Should I respect my children’s wishes and give up a relationship with him, or should I seek outside guidance and advice to see if we can try to be a family as we originally planned? I really feel like he is the love of my life. Nobody is perfect. I’m willing to give it another chance, but I want my children to accept him. I don’t know how or if they ever will. What should I do? — LEADING TO IT IN TEXAS

BEST HANDRAIL: Fear is absolutely the WORST reason for a couple to reunite. Your relationship failed because he is a cheater. Why do you think it would be different this time? There are worse things than being older and alone. There is no guarantee that you won’t meet someone and fall in love.

Your children hate this man for a reason. You ask whether you should seek outside guidance and advice. As the first person you ask, I’m totally in favor of it. Your doctor can refer you to someone qualified.

Dear Abby was written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or PO Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.