“I ordered my transgender brother to change his name, it’s unfair to my son”

A woman has told how her female-to-male transgender brother struggled to find a new name to suit his personality – but she disagrees with the one he has now chosen.

She says her new name will confuse her four-year-old son (stock)(Getty Images)

A woman has sparked debate after revealing she ordered her transgender brother to change his name because it was “too similar” to her son’s. The 26-year-old explained how she supported her brother through his transition, knowing their parents were completely against it.

She says her parents are “really transphobic,” which makes the family dynamic awkward for her 14-year-old brother. However, she does not support his latest name change, feeling it is unfair to choose a nickname so similar to her son’s.

She says this would not only confuse her four-year-old son, but would also not reflect well on her brother as a woman to a man. She said on Reddit: “I just want to say my brother is 14 and he came out this year, I’ve always tried to be as supportive as possible especially since our parents are really transphobic.

“I brought him a binder and a flag, I also yelled at our parents several times for things they said to our family members about him. Now let’s get to the point, I’m 26 and I I have a four year old named Finley, he always loved my brother and I asked my brother to explain to him what being trans was and he was great with it.

  • “My Entitled Mom Orders Me to Wake Her Son Before School Starts – I Taught Him a Lesson”
  • “I caught my mother having sex with my husband. I can’t erase this image from my mind”
  • She says her brother has been “between names” for about four months, struggling to find a male nickname that “feels right” to him. She added: “Since he came out to me, he’s changed his name almost every week. This week he sent me a message saying he found a name he really likes and that he thought he would stay.

    “When I told you I was speechless, he sent me a message saying he was going to be called Finn. I didn’t get mad or anything, so I replied ‘but Finley ?’ He tried to point it out without sounding harsh, but he replied “but it’s a completely different name, my name is not Finley, my name is Finn and Finley is never called Finn”.

    “I honestly felt really uncomfortable and tried to tell him how much this was going to confuse people, including my son whose best friends still call him Finn, it’s just family who doesn’t call him.” Seeking advice, she added: “I’ve tried to reason with him but he’s not moving so we haven’t spoken in two days and I’m kind of waiting for him to announce that he’s changed again.”

    Learn more: Sign up for Mirror US SMS updates to receive the latest news straight from the newsroom