close
close

I’m shocked that my best friend is having an affair with a married man

Dear Annie: I have a wonderful husband and a wonderful life, but for the past few months, something has been weighing on me. My best friend, “Amanda,” is having an affair with a married man.

I’ve known Amanda since we were kids. We went to the same college and have been through so much. I’ve always thought of her as a sister to me. But when I found out she was having an affair, I was shocked and hurt.

I tried to talk to her about it, but she just pushed me away. She told me it was none of my business and that I should mind my own business. But I can’t just stand there and watch her do this to herself.

I always thought cheating was wrong. Not only is it hurtful to the person you cheat on and their partner, it is also hurtful to yourself. I am afraid for Amanda, she is going to be hurt and it is going to ruin her life.

As a married woman, I also feel hurt. My husband and I have been together for almost ten years, but we have been married for four years now, and I can’t help but think about how I would feel if I knew my husband was ending our marriage for another woman, like this man is doing with Amanda.

Do you have any advice for me? I want to help her, but I don’t know how. I’m afraid that if I confront her, she’ll push me away. But I also don’t want to stand there and watch her make a mistake she’ll regret for the rest of her life. — A Concerned Wife and Friend

Dear Worried Wife: You’ve done your best to talk sense into Amanda, but she doesn’t seem ready to listen to you. Sometimes our loved ones have to learn their own lessons the hard way. Continue to be the supportive friend you’ve always been, but focus on your own life and marriage. You can’t control Amanda’s choices, only your reaction to them.

Send your questions to Annie Lane at [email protected].

More from MLive