Arsenal's 'crisis' talk came about when Thierry Henry spoke in seven-word riddles

Arsenal crisis talk called premature by man who starts Arsenal crisis talk as Thierry Henry says seven ‘telling’ words; we just don’t know which one.

Thierry Henry identifies…
Mediawatch had to laugh when we saw the actual top story on the website MailOnline football site:

Thierry Henry tells Arsenal they are not challenging for the title and highlights what the Gunners are ‘not good enough’ at, with concerns ahead of their trip to Chelsea

Firstly, Henry clearly told Arsenal nothing of the sort; he told CBS Sports Golazo.

Secondly, we’re pretty sure Arsenal already know they’re not currently competing for the title; they have access to the Premier League tables just like Thierry Henry.

And as for ‘what the Gunners are ‘not good enough’ at’… according to Henry on this particularly astute occasion, it’s getting results away from home.

And considering Arsenal have won just one of their last six away games – against Preston – we suspect Arsenal won’t be shocked by this insight that Henry has ‘identified’.

In fact, we’d go so far as to say they wouldn’t be at all interested in anodyne comments that could have been uttered by anyone with access to a results list and a Premier League table.

Yet it is absolutely the biggest story in football right now.

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SEVEN!
Taken from the same quotes, here is the take from football.london:

Thierry Henry makes a telling seven-word Arsenal prediction, as Mikel Arteta asked

This is excellent trolling, as there’s actually no clear ‘seven-word Arsenal prediction’ in Henry’s comments. And not once in the story is it mentioned that there are seven important words. So we can only guess.

When Henry was asked how Sunday’s match against Chelsea would go, he replied: “To reduce it to a prediction, he replied: “I don’t know what we’re going to do…’

There’s more, but we stopped at seven words.

So it could also be “the results are not good enough to’ or ‘I don’t think it’s good enough but’ or ‘let’s see what happens against Chelsea. I”.

Do any of these qualify as a “telltale seven-word prediction”? Maybe it’s “it will be extremely difficult because that’s what it is” or “I don’t see two teams collapsing. That is.”?

Or could it be that some usher at Reach – the same one who suggested that perhaps all journalists should produce at least eight stories a day? – has decided that seven is the magic, telling number, and no f***er is as pedantic as Mediawatch about actually counting them.

Crisis? Which crisis?
There at the Daily TelegraphLuke Edwards is building a straw red and white man and is busy tearing him down…

There will always be a temptation at Arsenal to overreact to any setback, and there will undoubtedly be those who will want to use a second successive defeat for Mikel Arteta’s side to provoke such a response.

Over the next 24 hours you will see and hear all kinds of scathing reviews. Words like crisis, incompetence and failure will fly around.

Mediawatch has Google at its fingertips (it’s very good, you know) and the search ‘Arsenal crisis’ returned two recent results:

‘Not a ‘huge crisis’ – Martin Keown insists Arsenal are ‘much better’ despite UEFA Champions League loss to Inter Milan’ – TNT Sports.

‘Yes, Arsenal lost, but they dominated Inter and this is just a blip, not a crisis’ Telegraph.

So far the only real talk of a ‘crisis’ at Arsenal has come from Martin Keown and Luke Edwards saying there is no crisis.

So what about ‘Arsenal incompetence’? No recent Google results.

And ‘Arsenal Failure’? The only thing that comes close is this – ‘Inter Milan vs Arsenal: Mikel Arteta’s side fail to rediscover their spark’ – from The times.

In fact, we’ve had a good look at the football media – it’s our job – and the coverage of Arsenal has largely boiled down to ‘something isn’t quite right, but the return of Martin Odegaard will fix a lot of that’.

But Edwards wasn’t just talking about the mainstream media; he predicted there will be “an explosion of noise on social media as people dive into the kind of frenzied scrutiny that follows a third defeat in six games.”

That’s why we searched for ‘Arsenal crisis’ on X. The best result:

‘Yes, Arsenal lost, but they dominated Inter and this is just a blip, not a crisis’

@LukeEdwardsTele #TelegraafFootball | #shooters

— Telegraaf Voetbal (@TeleFootball) November 7, 2024

Crisis? Incompetence? Failure? These words belong to Edwards and virtually no one else.

There’s a touch of #ArtetaOut trending, but social media has always had idiots and those who shout the loudest are the biggest dicks with the bluest ticks, as we think the old saying goes.

Addressing these idiots is a waste of time, so we’ll assume Edwards is talking to the casual fans, none of whom will expect the sacking of a brilliant but clearly flawed manager. And if they were, they wouldn’t consult the Newcastle man from the Telegraph first.

So yes, Arsenal lost again, but take a deep breath. Don’t be the panic button pusher or the attention-seeking rant.

Excellent advice, Luc. Maybe next time take a deep breath.

Oh what a shame…
So this may not be the worst example of churnalism you’ll see today, but this is a nice example of the lengths certain publishers will go to find a headline that could potentially end up on an aggregator or on social media. This is a headline made for Google Discover, where clickbait headlines can be rewarded with ridiculous traffic.

Chelsea boss Enzo Maresca admits three Blues stars can’t play together – ‘I feel ashamed’

Sounds like such a huge admission that we’re surprised we haven’t seen it elsewhere Mirror football.

And the article even begins: ‘Enzo Maresca admits he feels ’embarrassed’ after failing to put stars worth £135m into his Chelsea team.’

The problem? Enzo Maresca admitted no such thing.

This is what he did say: “I feel sorry for Joao and I would like to give him more minutes in the Premier League, but we need defensive balance and we cannot play with Joao, Cole (Palmer), Christo (Nkunku ). I would like to put them all on the field, but then you have to defend and you need the right balance.”

It’s clear he means he feels sorry for Joao Felix; English is not his native language and ‘It’s a shame for Joao’ has come out as ‘I feel a shame for Joao’.

I know, you know, and Daniel Orme from The Mirror absolutely knows that this is not the same as ‘feeling ashamed’ and absolutely not the same as ‘feeling ashamed’.

Is Maresca going to sue because they said he feels ’embarrassing’? No. Does it hurt anyone? No. Is it essentially deceptive and indicative of the malaise in journalism as a whole, leaving us feeling a little depressed? God yes.