Words to comfort high-risk youth after the elections

In my office, clinical needs skyrocketed last week. It reminded me of other moments in my life career when a national event caused significant problems for many people: 9/11, the 2016 election, the Muslim ban, COVID, and the Dobbs decision. In response to the outcome of the 2024 election, I am once again asking myself: How can I be most helpful to those in deep need at a time of great uncertainty?

The closer one is to a traumatic event, both emotionally and physically, the more intense the blow. If you lived near the Twin Towers or if you lost a loved one on September 11, the shock fearloss and mourning were intense. If you lived far away from the East Coast or had no direct connection to New York, the cities where the planes took off or the people lost, the event still felt terrible, but the effect was much less personal.

This construction also applies to the 2024 elections. You may feel fine after the elections. But there is a broad group of Americans who are experiencing significant emotional pain after 5/11. Some young people are at much greater risk self-harm and suicide now than last week. In my office, young survivors of sexual abuse report feeling betrayed and unsafe in a country that has just voted for a judge sexual abuser. Calls to the Trevor Project, a national suicide and crisis phone and text line for LGBTQ+ youth, increased 700% on November 6 compared to October. The number of conversations about the elections increased by almost 5,200%.

My approach at the office after November 5

Sometimes patients openly share their concerns about the election results, but others don’t know if my office is a safe space to talk openly. They don’t know if I will understand their heightened sense of vulnerability.

I ask patients who come into the office with an uptick in distress how they are feeling after the election. If they say “fine,” I move on to a topic of my choice. It’s possible they have concerns about the election but don’t feel comfortable sharing them with me. If so, they now know that I welcome a discussion on this topic if they wish to bring it up in the future.

For those affected, my question gives permission to share how they are doing. I’m interested in their perspective; it’s okay to talk to me about this topic.

If they are upset about the election, I ask for more details. Then, if applicable, we talk about how they suffered an emotional blow, directed against them, and that is why they feel so vulnerable, scared and alone.

As they express their sorrow, tensionor fear, I confirm their feelings that the results are very disturbing and the future is uncertain, which is scary. Everything else would be gas lighting.

I won’t go into the details of my political preferences, but I affirm the reality of this moment for marginalized groups. If the patient is satisfied with the current election results, it is my job to take my patients’ concerns into account – not impose my own.

Some patients have shared an increase suicidal thoughts with intention and a plan. As therapists we are confronted with a specific kind of wounded, and we need our words; they are our ointments and our medicines.

What I say to patients at increased risk of self-harm after the elections

When you hurt yourself, you join the group that has already hurt you deeply.

Right now, the act of greatest resistance is to provide yourself with unwavering self-care and compassion and to connect with your community.

This is a time when we need to reach out and be together. Only we are more vulnerable. Who can you go to who can help you with this feeling of isolation?

We don’t know what will happen in the coming days, months or years, but I promise you are not alone. We will continue to work together and this office will remain a safe place for you. I don’t have much strength, but I do have some. I promise use the power I have to advocate for your health care needs and make school a safe place for you.

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Some patients have asked me how I am doing – and the real answer is that I feel our conversations are very meaningful and that this work has laid a foundation for me during a very turbulent time. While the therapeutic relationship is a professional, the connection is real. I feel privileged when patients trust me to discuss these most sensitive topics. Personally, I feel less helpless when I can offer comfort and connection one conversation at a time. It seems to me that this is always the first step forward for all of us in tumultuous times.

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If you or someone you love is considering suicide, seek help immediately. For help, call 988 for the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, or contact the Crisis Text Line by texting 741741. To find a therapist near you , go to the Psychology Today Therapy Directory.