My boyfriend turns a deaf ear to me every time I want him to meet my family. People say he’s violent and that I should run away.

A woman has revealed her 48-year-old partner refuses to meet her family and “sulks” when she asks him to accompany her.

Speaking to UK parenting platform Mumsnet, the woman explained that her boyfriend was currently “in the shed sulking” because they had been invited to his mother’s birthday lunch.

She revealed that he “gets upset, makes a fuss and treats me with contempt” as each family gathering approaches.

People rushed to the comments to give their opinions, with many saying he looked “violent” and that she should leave him.

The message read: “My boyfriend is rejecting my family. My mother invited my boyfriend and I to lunch. It’s casual and in a coffee shop. We’ve been together for three years.

“He doesn’t want to go. This happens every time we go to see a family member or friend. He gets upset, makes a fuss, and gives me the silent treatment before the appointment.

“At the event he is usually polite but not very involved and then he gives me the silent treatment. Then we argue about it.

“He says he hates having to conform to other people’s expectations, like playing the role of a boyfriend. He’s 48 and starting to play a bigger role in my four-year-old son’s life, whom he adores.

“He made a commitment to us, but this dislike of my family really makes me angry and upset.

“I tried to understand but I find it very rude that he doesn’t give my family a chance. They are interesting and nice people who invite him to events to try to include him. We are going tomorrow and he is currently sulking in the shed.”

Many suggested the man was trying to isolate her from her family and friends and claimed he was “violent”.

One person said: “He’s 48 and acts like a rude 14-year-old. It’s unattractive.”

Another added: “This is a red flag, he’s trying to isolate you, the silent treatment is abusive. I’d fire this one.”

Someone else added: “Is he giving you the silent treatment? Is he sulking in the shed? This is manipulative behavior at best. Kick him out. He’s trying to isolate you from your family.”

Meanwhile, another added: “You realize he’s trying to isolate you, op? Then he’ll go after your friends. Then when he’s got you all alone, he’ll start raising his fists. I’ve seen it a million times. It’s a story as old as time. Run from this man and fast.”

However, others disagree with some who say he should not be forced to meet his family if he does not want to meet them.

One person said: “I don’t think it’s unreasonable to not want to meet your family or friends. He has the choice to meet whoever he wants. However, the way he’s going about it (the silent treatment, etc.) is not acceptable.”

“You have to ask yourself if integrating with your family is something absolutely necessary in your relationship and make a decision based on that. You can’t force him to be happy by meeting people he doesn’t want to meet.

“From what you have said, I disagree with PP when he says he is trying to isolate you from your family by having an aversion to meeting them himself, unless he is specifically trying to prevent you and your daughter from seeing them.”

Another said: “I think he has the right not to go, especially if he’s already met them and it’s not his thing, but it’s very unreasonable to sulk because you’re going; I’d even say it’s controlling behavior!”

Someone else wrote: “Does he have to come with you? Could you just see your family without him? You don’t live together or have a very involved relationship, so I wouldn’t push for meetings.

“If that’s a barrier to you, then he’s not the right guy. Either you have to accept that he has no relationship with your family, or he has to accept that he has one. What’s not acceptable is for him to sulk, get angry, and resentful about seeing them.”

Another added: “I feel bad for him. Sulking isn’t nice, but neither is being forced into happy family situations when you had a shitty childhood and put up huge protective walls.

“He wants a relationship with you where you keep your lives separate. I think that’s reasonable for an adult. We know what we want and what we don’t want at this age.”

The women added: “He says he hates having polite conversations and feels like he’s being interviewed/evaluated.

“My family is very tolerant and really nice people, so I think the problem is his perception rather than what my mother or anyone else says/does.

“He had a difficult childhood and didn’t stay in touch with his own family, which I think is significant.

“I can understand all of this, but I recognize that the hardest part is his reaction. His sulking and silence are not helping me and are making me angry. I’m tired of feeling like I’m dragging him out against his will.”