Dear Abby: My son’s fiancée says we all need therapy for our “issues”

DEAR ABBY: My son is engaged to a girl we all love, but recently there was a problem. My husband was at their house while my son’s fiancée was finishing up getting ready for their date night. (They live 10 minutes away and my husband has been there a lot since he retired.) When she was done, she came downstairs, told my husband they were leaving, and ordered my son to follow her to the car. My son didn’t say anything at the time. This upset my husband a lot because he values ​​the time he spends with our son, who is our only child.

Later, my husband and I argued with her, telling her that we didn’t appreciate her attitude. She responded that they had a reservation and that my husband was rambling and didn’t realize that others didn’t always have time to chat with him.

She then went on to mention several instances where my husband had made my son late for something. When we asked our son about it, we were shocked to find that he agreed with her! He said he didn’t want to talk about it himself because it made him uncomfortable. My husband likes to talk, but I don’t really see it as a problem.

Abby, I am concerned. I find her behavior extremely inconsiderate. I do not want my son to marry a controlling woman who will boss him around and refuse to see our point of view. She said she would only talk to us more if we agreed to see a counselor to discuss “all our problems.” I did not know we HAVE problems. My son has never said anything before, but when we asked him about it, he said he agreed with her. What should I do? –Amazed PARENTS-IN-LAW

DEAR PARENTS-IN-LAW: Take a step back and stop trying to defend your husband and son, who should have spoken up before his fiancée felt compelled to do so. If you want to maintain a relationship with your son and his future wife, accept his suggestion that you see a family therapist together. If you do, you may have the opportunity for each of you to air your grievances and come to an agreement that satisfies you both and avoids similar problems in the future.